Just a Stumble

They got away from me this morning,
my thoughts.
One after another they escaped
my close hold,
gaining momentum and
spinning into a swirling frenzy.

From the outside it looks like
any other morning:
coffee, email, pleasantries exchanged.

But inside I'm running and screaming,
knocking things over and
damning them to hell.

Allowing this duplicity feels like
a giant step backward,
a shove in the wrong direction
by my old friend fear.

I'm not interested in backward -
or fear for that matter - or hiding,
or anything other than what is.

So this morning, well,
it's just a stumble.
Pick up, dust off.

Keep moving forward
to the place where what's
inside and outside align.

After all, it's only life.
Might as well live it.